Every human being has a couple common goals, such as finding shelter, food, and love. Because a happy life consists of balance, it seems that finding love, especially love for oneself, seems to be the most difficult element to attain. DBT Treatment can give you Self-Love

The ability to love ourselves is a mindful practice that requires a conscious day-by-day effort. You can never expect anyone to love you completely.  Humans are fallible, imperfect in their love.  So to expect another human being to love you completely is setting yourself up for widespread disappointment and distress. Mother and fathers love imperfectly, Husbands and wives’ love imperfectly, friends and employers hardly ever get it right.

Today we like to offer 9 strategies, both physical and spiritual, that will keep you on track to reaching the self-love you deserve.

Yes, deserve. Remember, you were created from a perfect Universe. Logically speaking, this means you already have the many beautiful attributes that the Universe contains. So why don’t you deserve the same love and care?  Clearly, you are pretty spectacular!

Forgive and Let Go – By forgiving yourself and others and by moving forward you remove all the poison that is holding you down. It’s hard to feel love when you feel heavy and toxic. You may be saying, ‘but I was so wrong” “I hurt so many people” “I was so stupid” Again you are imperfect.  NO ONE is perfect.  Everything is a learning teachable moment.  Simply put, let it go, it’s over!

Get Moving – Exercise and get physical. It doesn’t matter if you just walk to the park, down the street or bike ten miles. Any movement not only increases the endorphins in your body, as well as builds confidence.

Realize Your True-Self – A topic we have mentioned before, but never seizes to be valuable. Here it is again… If you are made of Universal love, you are Universal love. The key to this strategy, is to merely recognize and remember your true-self.  Self- talk is critical here.  Anything negative is your ego talking not you.  The core of you would never speak harshly to you.

Take Some “You Time”– Every day set aside time for yourself and meditate, read, journal or just sit in silence. Most importantly the goal is to connect with your consciousness.

Consider Your Strengths – Remind yourself EVERY DAY, what you have done right or where you came from. By doing this,  you can put your personal beliefs and feelings into perspective. Allow yourself the positive credit you deserve. Journaling on this is critical.  Make a list review it every day.

Ask Yourself The Right Questions – As situations arise throughout the day, ask yourself, “is this honoring me?” Does this decision give me peace?  Does this thinking make me “feel good”.  If you have doubts then, it probably isn’t. Therefore, by asking this question,  you will be more prone to self-loving behavior.

Envision You’re Worth – During “your time” or when you have any moment throughout your day, consider your natural qualities and envision the life you will lead. Look to this vision, and keep the focus on the reality you deserve. Creating a vision board is helpful here.  Place it where you can see it every day.

Give Love, Get Love – It’s a known fact, you get what you give. Showing kindness and love to others, opens a special place in your heart; in which, you will find self-love.  Some people need to be loved from afar.  Sometimes far, far away.   “Do not give your pearls to swine” is a quote for this.  If we give and give with no return we can become resentful.  Resentful people never have peace and tranquility.

Be Free With Your Unique Gifts – Don’t allow others to stifle your creativity. When You withhold your true-self, the feeling of inadequacies increase. The authentic you is so valuable. You are unique to this planet, in this time and space.  Grasp onto your worth.  Know there will never be another like you.  You were created by a universe that loves diversity.    Honor that creative force by honoring yourself.

I hope these tips have helped you reconnected with your true-self; a truly amazing being. To honestly find that “sweet spot” in your life, you can create a balance by giving love and honor to yourself.

As always, remember you are worth it, you deserve it, and inherently you are love. We are here to help www.meehlfoundaton.org 

References

Those in DBT developed significantly greater self-affirmation,  self-love and self-protection as well as less self-attach, during the course of treatment; they maintained these gains at a 1-year follow-up.  Bedics, J.D. Atkins, D.C.,comtois, KA., & Linehan, M.M. 2012.