Walking with Death: My Calling as a Shaman and Psychopomp
I was only two years old when my mother died. From that moment, I was raised by my grandmother—a woman who teetered on the edge of death countless times. Living in her presence meant living with the constant awareness that she could leave me at any moment. That early exposure to mortality shaped me profoundly. It instilled a deep fear of abandonment, yes, but it also gave me an intimate understanding of life's impermanence. In those formative years, I began to learn something extraordinary: the presence of spirits and the threshold between life and death was more than abstract—it was palpable.
As a child, I watched others pass away. I noticed something that few speak of: a moment, almost instantaneous, when I could sense that a spirit had departed. There was clarity in it, a "switch" in my awareness, signaling that the spirit had moved on. Sometimes there was sorrow, but often, there was simply transition—a shift from one state of being to another. Occasionally, I witnessed something even more profound: a spirit lingering, anchored here in the physical world. These rare miracles revealed a truth that would shape my life: death is not merely an ending; it is a guide, a doorway, and, if we are willing, a teacher.
Eight years ago, after returning from a 14-day Ayahuasca retreat, Mother Aya spoke directly to me. She made it clear that my path was not to serve her, but to serve the Spirit of Death and Transformation through Psilocybin. In that moment, my calling as a shaman and psychopomp crystallized.
What It Means to Be a Psychopomp
A psychopomp is, at its core, a guide between worlds. In many traditions, shamans, priests, and medicine keepers have long understood certain plants and medicines as psychopomps—tools that help souls navigate the liminal space between life and death. The word itself comes from Greek roots: psyche, meaning soul, and pompos, meaning guide. A psychopomp is not someone who controls death or forces outcomes. Rather, they are a witness, a facilitator, a spiritual midwife for the soul.
For shamans and medicine keepers, the mushroom has been recognized as a psychopomp for centuries. Psilocybin carries us to the threshold of death and back, teaching us how to live more consciously. It whispers: "Nothing is lost. All is transformed." In ceremony, this guidance is subtle yet profound, helping participants encounter their own mortality, face fears, and witness the rebirth of their consciousness.
Psychopomps appear across cultures. In Ancient Egypt, Anubis guided souls through the Duat, the underworld, weighing hearts against the feather of Ma'at. In Greek mythology, Hermes escorted the deceased to the afterlife. Indigenous peoples in the Amazon, Mexico, and Central America have long employed plant medicine as psychopomps, assisting initiates in journeys where they symbolically die to the old self in order to embody new life.
When we understand psilocybin through this lens, it becomes more than a hallucinogen. It is a sacred teacher, a guide that helps us navigate thresholds that few dare to approach in daily life. It is a mirror, reflecting the parts of ourselves that we must see, release, or integrate in order to step fully into our true potential.
My Relationship with Death
To serve as a psychopomp, one must have a personal relationship with Death. This does not mean control, domination, or fearlessness in a vacuum—it means familiarity and respect. In ceremony, when I witness someone skeletonize, or experience the dissolution of the self before my eyes, I am not afraid. I acknowledge Death, recognize her presence, and allow her work to unfold. There is a sacred choreography to it: Death guides, I witness, the participant transforms.
This relationship with Death was forged early in my life, shaped by personal loss and the constant awareness of mortality. It has been refined and deepened through years of ceremonial practice and plant medicine work. I have learned that Death is not an enemy. She is a teacher, a companion, a mirror for transformation. To approach psilocybin without this understanding is to invite unnecessary fear. And fear, in ceremony, blocks the medicine. Love and reverence open the doorway.
Psilocybin as a Teacher
Psilocybin is not merely a substance; it is a spirit with intelligence and intention. In the presence of psilocybin, one can experience the dissolution of the ego, confront past traumas, and enter the threshold of death and rebirth without leaving the physical body. In this state, participants often encounter ancestral spirits, deceased loved ones, and aspects of themselves long hidden or forgotten.
The spirit of psilocybin teaches in subtle ways. It may dissolve the sense of self, present visions of past lives, or catalyze a profound sense of connection to the Universe. It also guides us gently toward death—not to scare or harm, but to illuminate the truths we resist in life. When participants understand that psilocybin is a psychopomp, they approach it with respect and openness, allowing for true transformation.
This mirrors ancient shamanic practices of soul retrieval and death-rebirth rituals. In these traditions, the initiate symbolically dies to the old self to embody new life. The process is not merely metaphorical. It is a tangible, experiential encounter with thresholds and liminality, often guided by a shaman, elder, or medicine keeper. Psilocybin acts as the bridge, carrying the participant safely to the threshold and back.
Preparing Participants for Ceremony
At the Meehl Foundation, preparation is essential. Every participant is guided through a detailed pre-ceremony process, covering the full spectrum of spiritual encounters: Death, Kundalini awakening, meeting deceased ancestors, and even revisiting past lives. Ceremony is sacred. Plant medicine is sacred. Meeting the spirit world is sacred.
Preparation helps participants release fear and approach the medicine with reverence. I teach that psilocybin is Love incarnate—a direct connection to the Universal Creative Force. Participants are encouraged to surrender, trust, and open to the wisdom of the medicine. In this space, transformation becomes not only possible, but inevitable.
plant medicine
The Role of the Shaman
As a shaman and psychopomp, my role is to hold space. I witness the thresholds that participants encounter and support them as they navigate these experiences. I honor the spirit of Death, recognizing its presence in each transformation, and I guide participants toward integration afterward.
This work requires humility, discipline, and a deep personal relationship with the invisible forces that shape our lives. It is not a performance or a role—it is a calling, a relationship, and a responsibility. A psychopomp must be grounded, compassionate, and spiritually mature, ready to meet each participant where they are and to escort them safely through the sacred threshold of death and rebirth.
Historical Context of Psychopomps and Death Guides
The archetype of the psychopomp appears across cultures and history. In shamanic traditions around the world, psychopomps serve as mediators between worlds. They escort souls, retrieve lost fragments of consciousness, and facilitate transformations essential for spiritual growth.
Amazonian and Central American traditions: Ayahuasca and psilocybin mushrooms have long been used to traverse the spirit world. Shamans guide initiates to confront death symbolically, integrate ancestral wisdom, and reclaim lost parts of the soul.
Ancient Greece and Rome: Hermes, the messenger god, guided souls to the underworld. Psychopomps in these cultures represented the archetypal guide, helping individuals navigate the liminal space between life and death.
Ancient Egypt: Anubis, the god of mummification and the afterlife, escorted souls through the Duat, ensuring safe passage and transformation.
Across these traditions, psychopomps embody a sacred responsibility: they facilitate encounters with the unknown, support transformation, and help participants return to the physical world with wisdom and renewed consciousness. Psilocybin, in modern contexts, continues this lineage. It is a bridge, a guide, a spiritual teacher.
Transformation Through the Threshold
Being a psychopomp is not about eliminating fear—it is about understanding it. In ceremony, participants may confront mortality, ego dissolution, or the dissolution of deeply ingrained patterns. My role is to witness, support, and honor each process. Transformation occurs at the threshold: the liminal space where death, metaphorical or literal, meets the possibility of rebirth.
Through psilocybin, we are invited to enter this space with courage and reverence. The medicine teaches that life is not linear, that death is not final, and that transformation is an ongoing process. Each journey through the threshold strengthens the connection to our own soul, our ancestors, and the Universal Creative Force.
Integration and Living the Calling
The work of a psychopomp does not end when the ceremony concludes. Integration is essential. Participants are supported in translating the insights gained into daily life, fostering conscious living and spiritual growth. As a shaman, I guide them through this process, helping them navigate the shifts in perception, behavior, and consciousness that arise after ceremony.
This is the essence of my calling: to witness death and transformation, to guide souls safely through thresholds, and to help participants embody the wisdom of the spirit world in their daily lives. It is a sacred duty, one that requires love, courage, and unwavering commitment to the medicine and the spirits we serve.
Conclusion
My path as a shaman and psychopomp is a calling forged in early loss, deepened through ceremony, and guided by the intelligence of psilocybin. It is a path of service, humility, and reverence. Death is not an enemy—it is a guide. Psilocybin is not merely a medicine—it is a psychopomp. Together, they illuminate the thresholds of transformation, offering participants the opportunity to die symbolically to the old self and be reborn into a life of conscious awareness, spiritual connection, and profound love.
Through this work, I have learned that transformation is not something to fear. It is a doorway. And when we step through it with guidance, reverence, and love, we are never alone.
Your Invitation to Transformation
At the Meehl Foundation, we honor the sacredness of ceremony. We guide participants through the spiritual landscape of Death, ancestors, and past lives, creating a safe container for transformation.
If you are ready to meet your own thresholds, to experience the guidance of psilocybin as a psychopomp, and to embark on a journey of profound spiritual awakening, we invite you to join us.
Yes — I'm Ready to Walk with the Spirit of Transformation
Step into ceremony with love, reverence, and guidance. Discover the wisdom of Death, the power of psilocybin, and your own capacity for transformation.
Plant Medicine
Shamanic Healing
Suggested Internal Links for Web Integration
Ancient History of Soul Retrieval: Shamanic Healing Traditions
Psilocybin Tantra for Sexual Healing: Evidence-Based Insights
Suggested External References
Carhart-Harris et al., 2017 – Psilocybin for depression and mystical experience
Griffiths et al., 2006 – Psilocybin and spiritual experiences in clinical trials
Johnson et al., 2019 – Therapeutic applications of psychedelics
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